Always Aroused Girl

Tonight we’ll take a look at one of the biggies, a veritable matriarch of the sex blogosphere, Always Aroused Girl.  This blog is interesting for several reasons.  First, its longevity allows a reader to observe its evolution.  Second, it manages to combine sex, life and, yes, business, in a way that seems, well, not as jarring as it should.  Third, it does these things in a pretty unassuming and down-to-earth way. 

 

Although the genesis of this blog is apparently lost to a hardware/software catastrophe some years ago, you can still go back and find where the famous AAG started, tentatively posting pictures of flowers, working through separation and divorce and a somewhat, at least it seems, halting reintroduction to sex in all its forms.  The thing is, AAG doesn’t seem to make a big deal of it.  It’s just the way it is.  Kind of like my observation of the other evening, though, AAG seems to be tiring of the sex part a bit.  Lately, a large percentage of her posts have been categorized under “Family” and just the other night she waxed eloquent about just wanting to have some plain home-cooked human contact.

 

Along the way she has picked up a lot of pointers and is more than happy to share her knowledge and experience.  Thinking of trying anal sex?  Look here.  Want to change the taste of your semen?  She has the answer. Need to torture a rapist?  Got you covered.  Sex toys?  She’s tried them all (no need to link, they are all over the side bar).  Just don’t ask her to wear sexy shoes. 

 

Back to evolution for a second.  Things here start kind of slow, pick up some pretty good sexual steam as AAG leaves her marriage (you can learn a lot about the good and bad of online dating here), then more personal non-sexual stuff comes in, and eventually we have…blogging as a business.  By now you probably have figured out that I would ordinarily jump all over (and not in a good way) any blogger with a virtual tip jar. I surprised myself here though, after thinking about it a bit.  AAG has a lot of wisdom and plain old advice, from which we can all learn something.  I charge for my advice, why shouldn’t she? And with her, payment is still optional.

 

Blog type:  Sport Utility Blog

 

Erotic Quality:  Anymore, this blog is not really about sexual adventure or experiences, except to the extent they serve to illustrate a point.  Lately, it hasn’t been about sex very much at all except to the extent you want to try to win a prize by writing a story about one (or more) of her sponsor’s sex toys.  Still, there is a lot for those who will take the time to go back into the archives.  The sex is not always perfect either, just like it isn’t for the rest of us.

 

Honesty:  I think this factor is one reason for the appeal and longevity of the site. AAG manages to make some more “out there” aspects of her sexual evolution and make them seem natural.  If you want her own take on the issue, look here, a post from 2006.  I do think AAG is getting a little tired of things, though.  It sure seems like she is ready to move on, but is staying around because her audience wants her to stay around.  Maybe I’m wrong, but I think this blog is entering its autumn, even if the some of us still don’t want to acknowledge the dropping temperature.

 

Presentation:  Go back awhile if you want the flower photos.  The commercial aspect is a little annoying, but the site is very easy to navigate, an especially useful factor given how much material there is here.

 

Comments: Lots and lots….just what you would expect.  The more interesting are those that pop up every now and then to question things like whether family belongs on a sex blog.  AAG’s many fans usually drown those folks out.

 

Fetish Factor:  I already mentioned AAG’s aversion to sexy shoes, but pretty much everything else is apparently fair game.  She does have a real affinity for mutual anal sex.  If you really want to test your mettle, read this: Snap. And then…read the comments…yikes!

 

Overall:  There is a lot of material here.  We get to know AAG as much as we can through an electronic medium, and clearly there are many who feel they know her well.  She is a supporter of many bloggers in this genre and has lots to offer anyone who will take some time on her site.  Maybe the thing I like the most is her accessibility.  Success may have tired her out a bit, but it hasn’t changed her much.

Expiration Dates

Reviewing blogs one at a time can give a different perspective than one seen by a regular reader. Instead of just stopping in for the latest, I make an effort look at the site in its entirety.  When I review a site, I try to go back to the beginning to see how the blog and the blogger evolve.  Sometimes this is just a matter of a few months.  Other times, it means years, and in those cases, hundreds of posts and thousands of comments.

 

The more blogs I look at, especially in the erotic genre, the more I wonder if blogs shouldn’t have a built in expiration date.  I’ve noticed that there seem to be stages in a blog’s evolution.  The beginning is often timid, even inhibited until the blogger becomes more comfortable with issues like expression, message and audience.  Sometimes, new bloggers have a lot on their mind and come out blasting.  While usually better initially, the reason quickly fades and one can feel both the author and the audience losing interest.

 

Most blogs seem to hit a stride after a few months.  By this time, the blogger develops a rapport, and often a dialog, with her audience and is getting enough out of it to keep up with regular posting.  After that though, it becomes more difficult to sustain momentum.  In the sex blog context, the subject matter is necessarily narrow and does not always lend itself to constant evolution.  The better bloggers seem to be aware of this reality and have developed various means to manage it, whether by selective embellishment of their adventures, actually trying new things, modifying their literary technique, or by slowly shifting focus.

 

The best examples of this evolution are the “lifestyle” sex bloggers.  When they start, almost all they talk about is the sex, sex, sex.  Sure, they pepper tidbits about their lives into the mix, providing context (or perhaps false realism) to their salacious tales.  If they hang around for awhile though, we start seeing more life and less sex life in the posts. 

 

When I started reviewing, I went to several of the more venerable blogs, all of which had been recommended by readers as “classics.”  The blogs were good, but they really weren’t about sex very much anymore.  I had to go back months in some cases to get to the stuff that made the blogs famous in the first place.

 

None of this is a criticism.  It is just an observation.  In some cases, the evolution itself is interesting, and what it means really depends on the original nature of the blog.  One generalization that does strike me, though, is that the long-term evolution far more often moves from more sex to less sex than it does the other way around.  I guess even sex bloggers get tired of it after awhile, and just want to talk about something else.

 

 

Barbed Wire Boudoir

Well, pressing on then, we’ll stay a bit deviant and take a look at an anti-sex-blog (“this is not a sex blog”) sex blog, Barbed Wire Boudoir.  This site offers some things to think about, and in its own way still fits the model of a girlfriend’s diary.  See, on this site, Luka lampoons the sex blogosphere and its conventions.  Now, in general, every part of any society needs a wag or collection of wags to keep it grounded.  It’s never good to take ourselves too seriously.  My real life profession is the subject of a whole genre of jokes, and rightfully so.  But back to the sex…

Luka is a self-appointed pricker of pomposity and hypocrisy in the sex blog world.  I had a little more time than usual, so I read through every post.  Many were very clever, some were mean, some were serious, and some were, well, odd (the mystery bruise?).  When Luka is on target, she is quite effective at knocking down pretension with wit and humor.  The problem is that while making fun of things is easy to do (and let’s face it, sex blogs are extremely ripe for parody) it is hard to control.  Knocking others off their high horse is one thing; doing it without sanctimony…now that can be a trick.  To be fair, Luka is not unaware of this risk, but that doesn’t keep her from falling into the trap every now and then.

Some examples illustrate these aspects of Luka’s approach: 

There are many good posts.  My favorite was a sex toy review of…the Brain. The Sugasm and HNT parodies were very funny, but Luka went on way too long with them.  Frankly, they are such easy targets that one or two pokes would have been enough to make her point.  Of course, Luka eventually starts participating in HNT.  She claims she does it for a laugh (and the stat boost).  I think it more likely she does it to show she is not a frumpy old rat bag (“Hmm, if I’m sexy, then I have more credibility when I de-glamorize sex!)  She does this with writing too: Moonlit is a nice piece of erotica with a Luka-esque twist at the end, accompanied by Proper Filth, a short assertion that she can write it, but not without making fun of it (“Hmm, if I can show I can write it too, then people won’t think I have erotica-envy…”).  Luka’s ultimate credibility builder, though, is self parody.  There is a great triptych of posts consisting of Top Tips to female sex bloggers, male sex bloggers and satirical sex bloggers. (These kinds of posts really annoy reviewers because they pre-empt anything clever we might think of to say…)   If you prowl around through the site, most of the good stuff is clustered in the first half of 2008.

Despite Luka’s constant assurances that this is all in good fun, she can be mean and deadly earnest.  For example, Luka takes a great satiric concept, a “condensed” sex blog, but presents it in an unsubtle and unfunny way: Condensed Blog 2.  (Luka’s commenters, though, loved this post.) Other times, she appears to take other sex blogs as seriously as the bloggers she is mocking: Go For It or Rather Don’t.  Despite the overtones of reproach and sanctimony, Thrill of Discovery is definitely worth reading and touches directly on the whole Girlfriend’s Diary thesis.

Although Barbed Wire Boudoir claims it is not a sex blog, we’ll stick with the formula:

Blog type: Satiric anti-sex-blog-not-a-sex-blog sex blog

Erotic quality:  Luka goes out of her way to de-glamorize sex, largely to paint a contrast to the sexual hyperbole found on most sex blogs.  It is effective, but not challenging.

Honesty:  Now this is a good question.  Why is Luka here?  She says it is because she can’t help but ridicule pretension, pomposity, elitism and stupidity.  Ok, fine, but there are many arenas where those traits exist.  Why pick sex blogs?  And if they are generally so worthless, why read so many?   Four thoughts, none of which is particularly insightful: 1) she is an insider using the old ethnic joke rationale-it’s ok to slam your own group; 2) she was once an insider, got caught up in the drama and decided to dedicate a site to a personal agenda ridiculing her former friends; 3) she was once an insider and needed a cathartic release after taking it too seriously; or 4) she is actually a big fan of sex blogs and just wants to keep them honest. 

Oh, and what’s up with that stat counter?

Presentation: A near-perfect parody of some of the busier sex blogs, including bogus award banners, HNTs and a lengthy blog roll.

Comments:  Ironically, as this site has evolved, Luka’s coterie of commenters seem to have become as happily pleased as those she derides on others’ sites.  I had to go back a month to find a comment that disagreed with anything she said. To be fair, there is plenty of controversy earlier on.

Fetish Factor:  Luka’s kink is extolling the value of plain old sex, complete with fat hairy asses, socks and occasional flatulence.

Overall:  I enjoyed this site quite a bit.  Luka throws some concepts on the table that merit review and consideration.  She’s damn funny most of the time (though she abuses the word “twat” and overuses “[object/arm/vegetable] shoved into an arse and photographed” as the stereotype of bad sex blogging).  The thing is, it’s hard to credibly criticize elitism and hypocrisy while occasionally indulging in it yourself.  The far better parts of Barbed Wire Boudoir raise questions about the reasons for, and consequences of, sex blogging.

Ok Luka, bring it on…..

 

Flawed Premises

So it seems I have operated from two flawed premises in starting this blog.  First, I wrongly assumed I would have the time to post regularly.  Obviously, this has not been the case.  Second, and more fundamentally, I have begun to realize that female blogs are not really a reasonable and accessible facsimile of your girlfriend’s diary.  A blog is meant to be read by others, filtered only by anonymity.  A true diary is meant to be read only by the writer.

 

When the author of a blog knows there is readership, and though comments, email or just by counting and tracking hits, interacts with that readership, she cannot help but slant the blog in one fashion or another.  Some of the bloggers reviewed so far freely admit this.  They have said they write knowing certain people will read.  Some have even admitted giving others editorial license.  Other writers may not be so forthcoming, but trends in their writing, whether it be themes, images, participation in the “community” activities, imitation, convention or even the sheer pace of posting, reveal a subtle but definite shift in response to their audience.  In some cases (though not necessarily any of those reviewed to date) the process becomes more about the blogging than about the blogger or, more precisely, what the blog reveals about the writer.

 

Please understand, this reality is not a criticism of anyone.  The observation is intended only to demonstrate that my model for “looking through the keyhole” is flawed.  Some level of distortion is always there.  I have tried to see how well that can be filtered, kind of like applying a corrective lens.  Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t, but to have any meaning at all, it takes more study than I originally thought it might. 

 

So, I am in the process of deciding whether I should commit to the extra study, which will cut down on the frequency of posts; post more, but with less attention to detail; or chuck the whole notion and just go back to being a reader.

The Seduction of Infidelity

 

At the recommendation of a number of readers, I stopped in on The Seduction of Infidelity.  All of them promised I would come away impressed…and they were right.  This blog is the highly articulate retelling of what amounts to serial infidelity.  Although peppered with frank descriptions of many, many extramarital encounters, there is a good running commentary and self-assessment that goes along with it.  This is a lifestyle blog, not a life blog.

 

The writer’s nom de plume,  Ms. Inconspicuous, is I think, intended to convey an “every woman” aspect to her desire and adventures.  Perhaps a scary thing for those of us men who think that stability, emotional support and modest attentiveness are all our women want or need.  Ms. Inconspicuous lays it on the line:  if you are sexually indifferent, your woman will find it elsewhere.

 

The writing here really helps set what is, deep down, a relatively pedestrian set of encounters, apart from the more over the top stuff you see elsewhere.   Ms. Inconspicuous has a litany of lovers, all different, yet all ultimately the same.  As she says:

 

Men are all the same underneath everything. Humans are skin and bone–it matters not what we do to elevate ourselves. In the end we are a mash of a mitochondrial cocktail, carbon and plasma and water. Just you, just me.

 

An Out-of-Town Date.

 

They all have their strengths and shortcomings, just as she does.

 

Ordinarily, I can find representative posts to illustrate some of my points. Here, it is almost not necessary.  Almost every post has something to offer, though I like the Sunday Confessions the best.  These recur, but usually offer more insight than the sex posts.  Listen to this:

 

A mistress is a resilient thing; an expert on surviving on crumbs and memories. I can be just fine with crumbs and memories; for when the crumbs come, they are exquisite, and they can be stockpiled into a veritable feast. The memories are forever. I preserve them on the page here just to make sure I ken all the details, but I’ll never capture the subtle nuance of a touch, the low growl of a voice, or the look in an eye that makes me yearn and purr and lust so.

But what if there are no crumbs?

Sunday Confessions: A Stupid Thing. 

 

Some of this blog is hot, some is hilarious (see, Anatomy of  a Letter or Foresight. I Have It.) and some, like the quote above, is heartbreaking.

 

Blog type:  Lifestyle 

 

Erotic Quality:  The writing (except for some of the inter-coital dialogue) is first rate.  The sex scenes are well set and relatively drawn out, though ultimately pretty tame.  That in some ways makes them more believable, if slightly less, well, fun.  Still, there are a lot of them and you are bound to find many you will enjoy.

 

Honesty:  The commentary posts help this aspect a lot.  The sex scenes are somewhat stylized to fit the author’s writing style, and may be more representative of real events than they are actually true.  That’s ok, though.  I found it all pretty authentic.

 

Presentation:  The structure here is good, especially the regular Sunday Confessions.  Ms. Inconspicuous even works in TMI and HNT in a relatively unobtrusive manner.  The pictures are more intriguing than most HNTs, and she even throws in some extras every now and then. 

 

Comments:  On some sites, the comments are more interesting than the posts.  Here, I found most of the comments, of which there are a great many, rarely added anything to the posts to which they refer. 

 

Fetish Factor:  For a site that is pretty sexually charged, the action here is pretty basic. There are a few instances of dominance and a large exchange of bodily fluids, but the variation here is much more of partner than of technique.

 

Overall:  I very much enjoyed this site.  There is a lot to discover here, but the best parts are incidental to the sex.  Ms. Inconspicuous lives and explores the lifestyle of infidelity.  The ultimate impression, though, is that her trysts are simply about process, an activity engaged in to make up for an absence of something else, and I don’t think it is just a lack of sex in her marriage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Sensualist’s Soul Desire

Unlike a lot of female bloggers who combine stories, life tales and overall musings in one place, the Sensualist splits her left and right brains into two sites:  Her creative right brain frequents The Sensualist’s Soul Desire; her more direct left brain shows up on her sexual op-ed site Sensualist Uncensored.  Although I gave some thought to doing a full review of both sites, I’ve decided for now to focus on the erotica and only refer to Uncensored as it bears on the main site.  (I will note that Sensualist does have a lot to say outside her stories; since its inception, posts on Uncensored outnumber posts on Soul Desire by 2 to 1).

 

Anyway, Soul Desire is a lush jungle of sensual stories.  They are vividly presented in the immersive I/you format.  Even when Sensualist switches perspectives, such as in the stories of her bisexual adventures, they usually are told in the context of involving the reader.  The stories always presume the reader is male, even when there is no male involved in the action.  Then, there are the pictures.  Each story is illustrated by one or more evocative black and white photograph.  The pictures are anything but explicit, yet serve their purpose better than if they were.  In response to several comments, Sensualist swears they are she.  We can only wonder, but all the photos plainly are of the same woman. 

 

There is a lot of material here, and most of it is very enjoyable.  For (I’m guessing) pure fantasy, check out the Naughty Nadia series.  For a beautifully written take on a first time meeting, start here, First Sight, and work through the series.  Sunday Drive and its conclusion are just plain fun.  With the Sensualist, it’s partly about the art and partly about pure sensory immersion.

 

Not everything works perfectly, despite the great pictures.  The “Eleven Things” series was a great idea, especially the teaser:

 

I have one dirty, nasty little habit I may need your help with.  But I won’t be confessing it today.  You will definitely have to keep checking in to read up on the latest. 

 

· The habit I most want to break and want your help breaking…well you will just have to wait.  Anticipate.  It will be worth the read.

 

I won’t spoil the surprise, but, well, it wasn’t.  To be fair, though, there were some good stories along the way.

 

There are also some anomalies on the site, stories that don’t quite fit the usual mold, such as a third person story of sexual tension that has never really been finished, a chapter with a title but no story, and a curious little snippet called “If You’re Going to…”,  written in third person and left unfinished.  It is a hot idea, but would be much better written in Sensualist’s usual achingly descriptive I/you format. As it is, it adds little.  Most of these date back to the early days of the site, presumably before Sensualist found her groove, so to speak.

 

What can I say?  We guys are suckers for being made part of the action, and this site does a great job of making it all about us and not some other dick.

 

Blog type:  Erotica/photography

 

Erotic Quality:  Sensualist is well named.  Her best work focuses directly on female sensory responses to sexual stimulus.  It is explicit without being the least bit vulgar.  While the subject matter does not push many boundries, the style is very seductive in that a reader, well a male reader anyway cannot help but drawn in.

 

Honesty:  Despite Sensualist playing coy about whether the stories are real or fantasy, I am pretty sure they are at most, “based on true events.”  More likely, given the detail of description, they are the product of a very vivid imagination.  I also have the impression she is playing a bit (or maybe a lot) to her audience.  She comes across as every man’s fantasy, but can anyone really be that? 

 

Presentation:  The site is very slick and enhances the whole experience.  Her choice to put her non-erotica on a different site was a good one.  One comment about Uncensored:  it is great fun to read, but the Sensualist over there is not the Sensualist we meet on Soul Desire.  Once you read a few posts on Uncensored, you lose a bit of the mystery/fantasy woman in those photos.  Maybe that’s good, maybe that’s bad.

 

Comments:  About what you would expect.  The comments from men outnumber the comments from women by about 5-1.

 

Fetish Factor:  Although (from what I surmise and have picked up from the other site) Sensualist is supposedly exploring her boundries after being repressed for many years, she really isn’t going too far.  Soul Desire is about as kinky as Playboy, which is perfectly fine, just don’t expect any BDSM or squirting orgasms here. 

 

Overall:  This site is sleek, sexy, deftly written and well, formulaic…but it’s a formula we can’t resist.

 

 

 

Tales of a Swinger

A (relative) newcomer to the sex-blogging world is Tales of a Swinger, as told by Swingerwife.  Her apparent goal is to chronicle her entry, and that of the aptly named Swingerhusband, into “the lifestyle.”  Now it is pretty clear that Swingerwife has looked into how this transformation can occur, and she certainly states the reasons why she and her husband have decided to explore other sexual options:  boredom, new found trust, a baby (a baby???…well, if you say so, Swingerwife…). 

 

There are a lot of blogs that focus on particular lifestyles, but they usually do so in the context of overall life experience.  We have reviewed some of these already.  Here, the only motivation seems to be the keeping of a journal of swinging activities.  The interesting part, though, is that Swingerwife, at least until very recently, was describing events that happened two months before the main events were posted.

 

Swingerwife was true to her mission initially.  There were posts describing their motivation, their rules, their successful search for the perfect couple, their preparations, the meeting and of course the ultimate consummation, see, It’s A (very) Sexual Thing.  This post contains an interesting quote on guilt:

 

My mind was still going a mile a minute with a tidal wave of thoughts and emotions. A part of me felt guilty. Yes. Guilty. Residual thoughts of the cheating wife variety. Wait a minute. I wasn’t cheating! My husband knew I was doing this. Gave me permission to fuck this guy if I so chose. Screw guilt. Guilt was over. Guilt was gone.

And replaced by one emotion, one thought, one feeling only.

Lust.

And thus, the swinging lifestyle was duly validated. Swingerwife is not too interested in the more complicated issues associated with swinging, the ones people want to know about.  Guilt lasted all of a few seconds; jealousy is mentioned only as something that doesn’t arise.  She does, to her credit,  devote a post to the possible implications of the lifestyle on her child: Balancing Act. Still, it would be interesting to get some more  perspective on the swinging lifestyle rather than just descriptions of its manifestations.

 

Swingerwife has a good memory for details, given that the events described happened quite awhile before.  Check out Awakening and Skinful.  The style reminds me of Penthouse Forum, in a guilty pleasure sort of way.  The site is quite popular, at least based on the hit counter, and these stories are probably one of the reasons..

Unfortunately, Swingerwife has been seduced by the blog stat siren.  Just as she seemed to be hitting her stride (though the story pacing was a little drawn out), she apparently discovered “attention.”  She posted about it and went all Sugasm and HNT on us.  In one post she lamented a lack of comments, then in another derided the judgmental nature of some of the ones she was receiving (though. I admit, in a very clever way).  By now you all know how I feel about these stat inflaters, but I was also disappointed by this post: Now That’s Hot.  Her swinger friend liked one of her posts, and she concludes, “That, my friends, is HOT!”  Sure it is…but telling us about it that way and for that reason, is NOT.

Swingerwife was really getting into a rhythm and then jumped the track.  Here’s hoping she gets back on.  Her slant is interesting and her writing is well-executed. She and Swingerhusband have met a new couple, so maybe we can get back to the lifestyle discussion.

Blog type:  Lifestyle Journal

Erotic Quality:  The concept and stories are good, and there is a lot of potential here to explore interesting themes through a series of erotic encounters. The posts about blog stats and comments, though are neither sexy nor interesting.

Honesty: I have probably thought more about this aspect than any other while reviewing this blog.   Swingerwife swears the stories are 100% true and does at least mention obvious concepts of guilt, jealousy and even the necessity of an available babysitter as impediments to embracing the lifestyle.  On the other hand, what is the probability of hitting a home run the first time out, moving rapidly into bisexuality, group sex and now, apparently a double penetration gig with a new hot couple?  Like I said…Penthouse Forum keeps coming to mind.  Bottom line, if it weren’t for the discussion about the kid, I’d say I don’t believe a word  after “Swingerhusband and I were looking at the computer together…”  Maybe I still don’t.

Presentation:  This site’s only embellishment is a HNT photo.  All the more reason to focus on the real content.

Comments:  This is one of the better aspects of the blog.  There is an interesting discussion about the clash between swinging and real life under Balancing Act.  This particular exchange suggests the relationship with Swingerwife’s “playmate” may not be quite as represented, but also is an interesting discussion of limits.

Fetish Factor:  All about swapping and the expected permutations deriving therefrom.

Overall:  I liked this site to start with, and I have been visiting from early on.  Then Swingerwife got distracted by the attention from her readers, and the veracity that came through at the beginning began to slip.  That too, becomes a distraction from an otherwise potentially hot site.  Just tell us about your journey!  We really don’t care if it’s true or not.  This is the internet after all, where fiction is sometimes more true than fact.

 

Pocket Secrets

Again at the recommendation of a reader, we are going to look at a different kind of site from the ones reviewed so far.  Pocket Secrets is a well-developed series of sexual vignettes that walk the line between erotica and porn.  Is erotica just well written porn?  I think the difference is more complex than that.  While erotica may be entirely fictional, it can represent genuine feeling.  Porn is, to me, nothing more than simulation, though I admit I’ve viewed plenty in my time.  But I digress.  This is about Pocket Secrets, not me. 

 

If women who crave sex are what you like, this is the place for you. Pocket Secrets sprays erotic bullets like a sexual AK-47.  Now we could just stop there, but what fun would that be?  See, some female blog sites tell you why they do what they do, some over and over again.  This one is different, because it is essentially all stories, most short and to the very explicit point.  In trying to get a little insight (read blind ass guess) into what is really going on here, I read every post, going back over more than a year.  Interestingly, the first posts were softer and most often written in the “I/you” perspective.  Later, there is a shift to a harder edge, and we see much more “I/he.”  The same themes of complex sexual immersion are there, but the presentation is discernably different.  While Pocket Secrets is a great read, I have to say I like the earlier material better.  I have a suspicion it is more, well, heartfelt.

 

Here are some examples of what I mean.  Compare Ringside Seats or Touché to Saturday Night or Yours for the Taking.  Ones like the latter two don’t show up so much anymore.

 

Ok, there are a couple of other clues out there.   Passion’s Path is one of the very few posts that deviates from the format with a little autobiographical note.  Looking for a Few Good Men kind of goes to what this blog is about.  “If you can handle me, you will reap great rewards, but boy, be careful what you wish for.”

 

For all the overuse of the vowel “u” throughout this blog (apparently “fuck” “cunt” and “cum” are Pocket Secret’s favorite words), the writing is witty and effective.  And every now and then, she lets us see something else. Just look at Satisfaction Guaranteed.

 

Blog type: Erotica

 

Erotic Quality:  If you like the edge and don’t mind the porno talk these stories are hot stuff.  It’s an unapologetic pursuit of sexual satisfaction in all its forms.  Some is really quite sophisticated.  I thought A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words was masterfully conceived, but I confess, I could not handle that truth.

 

Honesty:  I think the early stories have real feeling behind them.  The later stories are more polished in some ways, but somehow don’t seem quite as genuine.  I think she started writing to a particular person, but these days, whether he is still around or not, Pocket Secrets is just having fun with our heads.

 

Presentation:  Pocket Secrets gets straight to the point in most cases.  That fits, because her sexual appetite is equally as direct.  There is very little languid sensuality here.  Also, with a very few exceptions, Pocket Secrets avoids the standard blogosphere junk that interrupts the flow and character of many sites.  Good photos accompany each post.

 

Comments:    There are lots of comments here, and Pocket Secrets is very good about responding.  She stays in character too.  Somebody told me she’s the best flirt on the internet.  Well, maybe….

 

Fetish Factor:  This is kind of funny, because as direct and unabashed as Pocket Secrets is, she doesn’t waste too much time with kink.  She wants it in her mouth, in her pussy or in her ass, and she wants it now.  If there is a kinky theme here, it’s her desire to be a complete sexual plaything…as long as she gets what she wants too.

 

Overall:  This was a fun site to review. Punchy, direct, well written and largely devoid of much ruminating about anything off-topic.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy reviewing the more wide ranging and contemplative blogs too, but Pocket Secrets was a nice jolt in the pants and the brain.

Indiscretion

At the recommendation of several readers, I spent a fair amount of time browsing Indiscretion.  The prolific blogger Marianne uses this site to document a journey of adultery, though in reading the content, that basic subject matter seems more incidental than focus.  It’s really more the excuse for us all to go there and talk about sex.  And on Indiscretion, talk we do, as much about the often paradoxical feelings created by sex and relationships as the act itself. 

 

Don’t get me wrong; there is sex here in both variety and abundance.  Marianne most frequently uses the standard “fuck and tell” format to describe dalliances of all kinds outside her marriage.  She seems primarily into sex without attachment but at the same time admits to a level of attachment in even the most casual of encounters.

 

The writing is quite literate and thought provoking.  The J Word is a wonderfully concise wrestle with her own (she didn’t say it but I will) hypocrisy.  I also appreciated Revision, a starkly honest flip side to the relentless pursuit of sexual exploration and gratification.  My favorite post was Package Deal, probably because it touches on the issues that prompted me to start this site. Marianne asks:

If you want me — do you want me? If you want me, you’ll get what you want, probably, and much more… and the more won’t necessarily be pretty. …

Can you handle it? Can you handle me? Do you want to? Do I want you to? If you figure it out, if you figure me out, let me know.

Although the site is really about sex, many of the best posts are categorized as “not really about sex.”  They still are about sex, of course, and depending on why you are here, are often way more interesting than the “he tied me up and screwed me silly” posts.

 

This is a big site, so here are some other representative highlights:  Need (an evocative expression of lust);  Inconvenient (the ultimate Dear John letter); Choices (a cogent explanation of why Marianne chooses the lifestyle described in the blog); and One Track Mind (Marianne’s ode to a cock).

 

I’ll let you find the hot sex scenes on your own.

 

Blog type:  Erotic diary

 

Erotic quality:  The erotic quality here comes in two flavors:  sex and talking about sex.  If you want good raunchy descriptions, they are here.  If you want some thought provoking reading about sex, you will find that here too, and really it’s the better part of the site.

 

Honesty:  This ranks pretty high, though I am always leery of those authors that I know blog a lot and sometimes change their angle on a given subject.  That doesn’t make their writing less honest, as many people, especially women, have many facets they may want to explore.  As to this blog itself, I get the feeling the adultery/infidelity theme is really more a vehicle for expression, or even a metaphor, than it is an actual lifestyle.  Even if that is the case, it doesn’t make it less honest. But here is an interesting quote:

 

You know, after you’ve been writing for a while about sex, people start actually believing what you tell them.

 

Presentation:  The site itself is clean.  There are (alleged) photos of the author and some of her intimate possessions sprinkled around.  The quality of the pictures is not very good, but really, come here for the articles, not the images.  The categories are helpful, especially given the size of the site and the diverse nature of the posts.

 

Comments:  The comments on this site are some of the best I’ve seen.  Marianne has been around awhile and has what appears to be a bigger than average regular following.  Moreover, the nature of many of her posts stimulates discussion.

 

Fetish Factor:  To briefly categorize, this site is genus: adultery, species: BDSM.  But there is plenty of everything here.  You’ll find something you like.

 

Overall:  You’ll come for the sex, but stay for the discussion.  I enjoyed this site very much.

The Slutty Duckling

Despite the cutesy name, The Slutty Duckling is definitely not for the young.  I have to admit some very mixed reactions to this site, written by a woman who is  “just placing [her] attention whore self out where everyone can see.”  When I first stopped by I thought the site mundane.  The posts lamented the unavailability of well-fitting bras and the prosaic side of squirting female orgasms, i.e., what to do about the sheets afterward.  I didn’t have time too look at too much more, but I wasn’t sure this blog would really qualify for review.  I decided to come back though.

 

On my second visit, I discovered the place was anything but boring.  Certainly not everyone’s kink of the week, but definitely not boring.  I mean, Slutty Duckling actually uses “knife play” as a tag on one post, and she  means it in a good way.  Going back through the posts was kind of a whipsaw, but the common theme here is the consistent return to “he” who gives Slutty Duckling what she wants.    I’ll let her tell you what that is herself:

 

I have this urgent need to be abused. A girl can only do so much with her own two hands and a vibrator — especially when she needs the first to use the latter. I want my hands tied above my head and something, anything, violently shoved into my cunt. I find that I can’t ram myself hard enough with a toy to make myself scream. It’s like how you can’t kill yourself by holding your breath; you’ll pass out and start breathing before you get there.

 

There is way more than that on this site, as the real journey here is how Slutty Duckling tries to find that paradoxical place where some very unpleasant behavior results in very pleasant sexual release.  Sometimes she finds it: Warm and Wet; sometimes she doesn’t: A 3 Year Loss.  The blog has been around since last March, and you can see the evolution clearly into more and more of what we could call “hard submissive” sex.  There is a distinct violent component here that some will like and many will not.

 

Blog type: Erotic journaling

 

Erotic quality:  The core here is quite polarizing.  You will either love it or it will make you uncomfortable.  The diaristic nature of the blog ironically impairs the erotic quality at times, as it veers off into unsexy things like bedbugs at her lover’s place and the time of the month when the “red lube” (as she calls it) flows.

 

Honesty:  The hardcore sex is too detailed not to be genuinely felt by the author.  Even so, I sense there is a strong overlay of fantasy in some of the encounters that are presented as real.  Maybe not, though.  Of course, if we are to believe everything we read here, the blog may end soon as Slutty Duckling appears to have found the abuser of her dreams and will probably not get permission from Him to type…

 

Presentation:  The site is completely unadorned.  No pictures, no art.  Just a diary, except, of course, for the increasingly ubiquitous Sugasm interruptions.

 

Comments:  Slutty Duckling has her fans for sure.  Given the violent overtones of much of her writing, it was interesting to see that many are women.

 

Fetish Factor:  The violence was exactly what I needed to jump start my mood.  ‘Nuff said.

 

Overall:  Whether you will enjoy this site really depends on how you are wired.  I can appreciate the fact that Slutty Duckling writes without regard to what people may think, and she does toss out the “is it really abuse if I like it” conundrum for us to think about.  That being said, I got the feeling of being played a few times as I read through the posts.